Monday, September 6, 2010

disneyland

is magical. i wouldn't mind going on my own during the night when everything is all lit up. it truly is my favorite place in the world. pathetic? slightly.

Tuesday, July 20, 2010

note to self

everyone is a creeper.

Monday, June 28, 2010

the soup

SHOOT.
give up.

Friday, June 25, 2010

woam

so...i really wish i had a printer in my room.

Saturday, June 5, 2010

birfday morning realizations.

so, it's the morning of my birthday and here i am blogging.
i don't really know what possessed me to come here to write, but here i am.
so i started reading my blogs from the past, and wow, let me tell you...it's really strange.

when i look back now, it's weird remembering all that has happened in such a short amount of time. when i read the words i wrote, i can't specifically remember the people i was talking about, unless i actually typed their name, but i can remember the feelings that consumed my body like the plague. extreme happiness, extreme sadness, and extreme infatuation.
it's funny to see how my moods could have elevated then dropped so quickly.
but i guess that's teen angst eh?

a lot has happened this year.
it's weird thinking that another year went by so quickly.
it seems that every passing year just goes by quicker and quicker.
but i guess that's growing up eh?

it's funny cause when i was looking back, i can tell when i thought i was in love. or when i thought it was the end of the world. or i thought i could never be as happy as i was in that moment.
i've learned that life truly does go on.

i'm still here today, here, typing this.
i've learned so many things this year.
so many life lessons.
it's made me grow up a lot. i realized that although everyone wants to stay a child, eventually you do have to grow up.
no, you don't have to lose everything, but you do have to start taking responsibility for your life. no matter how painful and difficult the journey is, if it's not okay in the end, it's not over.
the road of life is a confusing one, but it's worth it.
everyone knows that they're gonna die someday, but it doesn't stop us from living.
i believe that life is limited for a reason.
if we knew we had all the time in the world, nothing would get done and life would be meaningless.
knowing that we're on some kind of a deadline gives us that extra push to strive for greatness and strive to enjoy every precious moment we have left.
no one ever knows when they're going to go and yet, they believe they're invincible and that there is all the time in the world.
i believe that many people young and old don't understand that time is limited in this world.
it doesn't matter if you're rich or poor. i believe that as long as you're happy, life's mission is accomplished.
i don't want to die selfish. i don't want to die regretting. i don't want to die thinking i could have done more "if only".
i want to die happy and proud of what i did in my life.
i know that i will make stupid decisions along the way, but that's all part of the experience.
live and learn.
and thanks to a special person, i've learned that life is a celebration.
it is something that should never be taken for granted.

yeah, it is kind of ridiculous how much i've come to realize this year.
i know when i look back on this, i'll be awed. or annoyed. either or. i guess we'll have to see.
i know it may sound like i think i know all about the world now, but i know i still have a lot of growing up to do.

i feel that you know what the point of life is better when you're younger.
your thoughts have yet to be shifted by the outside world.
the goal in mind for a happy life is clear when you're young and naive.
when you grow up and life touches you. that is when things go haywire.
and that is why people lose sight of what is really important.

i'm only 16, and yet to be truly corrupted by the outside world, but i've seen and heard about a lot. i may not be the brightest kid, but i believe that i know what is important in life. my vision of what should be achieved may be blinded sometime, but without that, what would life be, but perfect and utterly boring. no journey, no destination.

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

MAOW

so let's get right into this...

there's not much you can do to document life. often times, you won't know where the time goes and next thing you know, weeks, months, years, go by in the blink of an eye. No matter how much you try to share each detail, there's no way that it will happen the way you want it to. I've come to learn that life is about those memories you create. The ones that always seem to come to mind with out being reminded, the good times, bad times, and the times that you live and learn through.


Tuesday, March 23, 2010

my life is falling to pieces

right before my eye.

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

what a pooper

aplauso para ti. one random phone call and you call me retarded.
i'm still mad at you.

jerk.
i guess i'll see you friday.

Sunday, February 21, 2010

DEREK FROM STARBUCKS!

DES, ASHLEY, SHARON, AND I WILL FIND YOU!

HOLY SHI

MUST WATCH.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6wS50241dic&feature=related

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

slightly ticked

it's funny how you can go from talking to someone all the time to never talking to them at all.

I hate it, cause we are such good friends. As sad as it sounds, I feel really, neglected? HAHA, is that even the right word to describe it? I don't know, but I do know that i feel really shad about it.
I've already made my attempt to spark conversation with this person and whatnot, but the past couple of weeks, i've gotten no reply. Or, we'll start texting for a while and then...this person just disappears. It could be that our phones are wack, but i'm pretty dang sure that he's gotten at least a handful of my texts.

I've been pretty bitter about all that. It's kinda like he doesn't have time for me anymore or he just doesnt want to talk. And when he finally did send me something, i was way to upset to even start and keep a normal conversation going. i'm pretty sure i annoyed him to no end, but whatever, i could honestly care less right now. and i think the only reason he texted me was cause he was bored. Not cause he actually wanted to talk.

what a bummer.


on the bright side...i've gotten a lot closer to people in my journalism class...

BUT. this one girl still annoys me to no end.
i would have never guessed that this girl of all people would become someone that i STRONGLY dislike.

Thursday, January 21, 2010

fun day

if i don't say so myself...

well, first of all, practice got rained out once again(:

so since i don't have a 6th period sticker thing, i would technically have to wait till 3 to get out, buuuuuuut, jane, ashley, and i started formulating a plan to get me out after 5th while we were in journalism. there was this super long complicating plan, but everything was made simpler when ashley told me she had an extra sticker that i could put on my card. so, my brother, jane, ashley, and i just walked out of school in a group. SUCCESS.
then jane took us to pho! good stuff i tell you. good stuff. especially in this weather.
theeen, we dropped ashley off at her work and then jane made her way to the ahn house.
I AM NOW BANNED FROM JANE'S CAR BECAUSE OF MY BROTHER -_-
so, i go home, showerm watch some tv and then knock out for about 3 hours.
i wake up, have a random urge to eat junk food. so i do that and then attempt to start my homework.
i have yet to start.

BEAR GRYLLS FTW.

Wednesday, January 20, 2010

blogger via text is a fail.

erf.

the game got rained out today(:
bloody fantastic. stuff like this never happens!

i've got to say i'm pretty impressed with myself. as much as i wanted to talk to him, i restrained myself and kept focus. the feature page is gonna be bomb arse.
although i was actually focusing to meet deadline today, after, when i was waiting for my page to be checked, i had the weirdest conversations with people about the past. strange strange stuff i tell you. i even made a family tree with des! we're connected in the weirdest ways possible. no joke.
and when we were walking to jane's car our shoes got soaked through cause we didn't see the stupid puddle -_-
we did have good conversation though. can't wait till the banquet! Marcel is driving(:

anyways, got home and totally knocked out. rain is great napping weather.
still got lots to do, but at least my page is done.
assistant's issue next month D:
i'm pretty stoked and nervous!

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

oversized sweaters

are ridiculously comfy and warm.

stayed at school till 7 today. worked on the page from like lunch till 7.
loong arse time, but totally worth it.
i love spending time in that class with all the people.
FEATURE is gonna look BOMB this issue.
better go read it!
your mind will be blown.

i still have math homework to finish ):
and i still have to write a birthday card, but at least i finished with all the baking and cleaning!
i really hope it keeps raining ridiculously hard like this all through the week and everything soccer related gets canceled. I could really use this week to REGROUP.


i will attempt to try uber hard this semester.

Monday, January 18, 2010

my parents

are baaaaaaack!

i missed them, but i had so much partying in the house.

thursday - went to court with my brother -_- boring stuff. then alysoon slept over. goodness gracious, i dont think i've ever eaten so much. we ate like beasts. even when we weren't hungry we ate. hahah. watched some tyra and jersey shore, bahah, new favorite show. and to keep awake we split a 5 hour energy drink. it only worked when we were moving though. so we just pigged out, talked about everything, and finally fell asleep around 5ish.

friday - went to international deli with the team, drove around, and had a game against glendora. then katie slept over. she came over and we were both exhausted after our games, but we partied like beasts. we took a walk around my neighborhood then got inside and danced like maniacs. oh goodness...our dance to love today is amazing! then we watched the ugly truth with opa and after we watched angus, thongs, and perfect snogging. good movie with cute british boys. we did attempt to pig out, but it was a fail compared to pigging out with alysoon. then katie forced me to set up the wii and we played wii sports for about an hour? she wouldn't let me stop playing tennis until she beat me, which was like 134832 games later. my arm is sore to this day -_- we finally fell asleep around 5ish?

saturday - cleaned the house like a maniac after katie left then ashley came over and we went to snowfest, then we walked home and ate while watching angus, thongs, and perfect snogging...then jane came over and we started watching district 9, but soon changed to an extremely goofy movie, and then finally to howl's moving castle. haha. some good lines in that movie. after that, we got hungry so jane drove us to that ramen place across from yes plaza. it took us forever to decide on where to eat cause ashley kept changing her mind. hahah. then we drove home and jane let me stick my head out the window on the roof. good stuff. and then we got prepared to watch paranormal activity. scary shi. we were super freaked at the end, but finally got off the couch to get some toaster struedel. ahha. then we started watching a goofy movie so we wouldn't be scared. then they left and i was left home alone till my brother came -_-

sunday - woke up suuuuuper late. 1:30 to be exact. then i watched harry potter 6 with my brothaa and bummed it out on the computer. then i went to katie's house to do nonsense. we played shrek on her ps2 for awhile then moved on to the simpson's road rage. fun stuff. I ALMOST BEAT HER. then we moved on to watching love and basketball while we ate m&ms and katie ate her cheerios. must finish watching that awkward movie... my brothaa picked me up and we decided to go get some in&out. did that, ate it while watching hitch. and then my madre and padre got home from the airport. now i'm just bummin.

wonder what monday, well today is technically monday, has in store for me (:

Monday, January 11, 2010

everyone

sucks.

my thought of the day.

Friday, January 8, 2010

AHHHHHHHHHHH.

i'm so flippin hyper.
it's redick.
5 hour energy drink is the shiiiiiiii.

Thursday, January 7, 2010

r,i,p. philly's gramps.

he's gone.

Wednesday, January 6, 2010

it's gonna be one of those weeks.

so I went to my first funeral today.
I didn't cry as much as I thought I would.
It could be cause I hadn't seen Mrs.Stoltz for a couple of years since she died.
It was a celebration of her life, yet while we all sat and reminisced about the impact she's had on everyone, it was impossible not to cry.
I don't specifically remember any special moments that i've had with her, but I know that I did feel the impact of her life's work. She, although I was never as close to her as I have been with other teachers impacted me in the most round about way possible. Like i've learned from her program, everything is connected to everything else.
I guess this was the final goodbye to a wonderful teacher and most of all a wonderful person.

I regret so much.
I regret how I never spent more time with my great grandma.
Sure, the language barrier is one thing, but I wish I hadn't been so childish and bailed the moment I saw the chance. There were so many times where I could have just sat with her and kept her company. The times when she still vivdly remembered who I was. She's done so much for me and she took care of me with so much love as a child. Now, after all those lost years, she lays in her hospital bed so close to death. In so much pain yet so peaceful at the same time. She's not expected to survive the week, but I know that when she leaves, she'll be in a happier place.
Although she's started to forget all her loved ones due to Alzheimer's, she will never be forgotten by the ones who love her the most. A person only truly dies when the last memory of them leaves the earth.

Phillip. One of my life long friends. I've known him since forever and I've grown to love him like a little brother. Over the years, our families have grown close and over the years i've been able to feel the love from his grandparents. Although it was mostly his grandmother that I saw and spent time with, his grandpas was there as well. I never had the opportunity to get to know this man, but seeing as he raised such wonderful people, he must've been a heck of a great man. He was fine the last time I saw him. Happy as ever on New Year's Eve. Now, he lays on his deathbed surrounded by family and friends. It was so unexpected. The cancer had been there for a while, but they never knew it was in his brain too. There are to many tumors to remove and the bleeding has gotten to bad. They don't expect him to live past this week either. All I can do is pray for Phillip's family and hope for a miracle.

Last, but certainly not least. Olive. I miss her like no other. I can't believe it's already been a year since you had to leave. It seemed like just yesterday we were playing together outside and you were sneaking into my bed for warmth in the mornings. I miss everything about you. I remember when you first came into my home, you were so fragile from the surgery, but by some miracle, you found the strength to get up and walk to the kitchen to greet the rest of your new family. I don't know how it happened, but you found a way to grow on the whole family. You had a way to make everyone fall in love with you. I could tell you anything and I knew you would listen. I knew you never understood anything I said, but the fact that you would just sit there with me was better than anything. You've impacted the whole family more than you'll ever know. It hurts knowing that all the plans I made for us will never happen, like going to college with me and living with me when I got out, but I know you're in a better place now. As quickly as you came, you left. I would never take back adopting you though. It was set for you to be put to death the following day and although you only lived a year and a half than you were originally suppoesed to, it was worth it. I love you best friend.

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

people die.

it's all part of life and growing up.
it sucks, but shit happens.

Monday, January 4, 2010

it's going to be okay

it's going to be okay cause when one good thing leaves, another one comes along.
it might take time for it to happen, but it will happen.
don't dwell in the past.
don't wait for someone who obviously doesn't care for you as much as you care for them.
forget them, carpe diem.

i can guarantee you'll waste a lot less time and finally be able to see the good things that are right in front of you.
i guess i've had to learn the hard way, but it's okay because i know that in the end, it'll all work out.
there's gonna be a lot of crap along the way, but there's always a light at the end of the tunnel.

people come, people go but in then end, the ones who were truly meant to stay with you will be there.
at the end of the day when i look back, i know i have people who will always love me and be there for me even through the worst.

why didn't i realize any of this nonsense sooner?

Friday, January 1, 2010

hello new year.

you've finally come!

i will make this year epic and i refuse to let anything get me down.

2009 was trash so we got to make it all up this year.

ready?

cause i am.